Have you wondered where the title of this little blog comes from? Do you say to yourself, “Self, I just can’t sleep until I find out why Joey named her blog ‘The Telnet Mars’! I just can’t!”

Well wonder no more. I present to you the origin of “The Telnet Mars”.

A little background is in order.

I hang out on a BBS, which has been my regular net hangout for the last ten years. I can usually be found there giving my friends shit, torturing newbies, grousing about work and generally enjoying life. This helped me keep my sanity at my last job, which was sucking my soul out through my ears.

In this scenario, I am ‘marcie’ and I am working as a peon junior systems administrator at my former job. I have received a ticket from our illustrious helpdesk that is making me twitch. Herein:

marcie: When she is logged into the server from home she can
marcie: not edit unix commands. She said that Jane Smith can
do this with her account. Her
marcie: instructor said to call the helpdesk.
marcie: goody.
marcie: SHE CANNOT EDIT UNIX COMMANDS!
marcie: i'm going to make this into a song
Slayer: what?
Slayer: i'm so confused
marcie: along with "how to make /etc/defaultrouter file?"
DontKnow: as in tcsh command line editing?
*** xi-fewd is now known as Xi
marcie: i have no idea
marcie: probably means she typed 'dir' and it didn't work
marcie: or something like that
marcie: SHE CANNOT, SHE CANNOT, SHE CANNOT... EDIT! UNIX! COMMANDS!
Vanyel: ahahah
Vanyel: this is why I wish I could play guitar
marcie: me too
Vanyel: i've already got a guitar riff for that song
Vanyel: in my head
marcie: When she is logged into the server from home she can
marcie: not edit unix commands. She said that Jane Smith can
do this with her account. Her
marcie: instructor said to call the helpdesk.
marcie: YEAH
marcie: CALL THE HELPDESK
Xi: UNIX Punk songs

Later that same … well, month:

marcie: Audrey in Admissions; reported that she is in the telnet Mars, and she is
marcie: getting errors
marcie: SHE IS IN THE TELNET MARS
marcie: !!@#!!
marcie: SHE IS GETTING ERRORS!
marcie: IN THE TELNET MARS!
marcie twitches
Vanyel: damn marcie
Cyrano: all your helpdesk are belong to us.
Vanyel: ahahah
marcie: and you can HAVE THEM ALL

And later still, after I’ve had time to adjust, Vanyel reminds me of my pain, curse his black heart:

Vanyel: shes getting errors IN THE TELNET MARS!
marcie: SHE CANNOT! SHE CANNOT! EDIT! UNIX! COMMANDS!
Vanyel: *scratch scratch scratch*
IGadget: the web is from venus , telnet is from mars
Vanyel: ahahAHAHAH
Vanyel: she doesnt know stty erase
marcie: HAHAHAH
marcie: i love you people
Vanyel: she doesnt know how to use backspace
Vanyel: she cannot edit her unix commands
Vanyel: SHES GETTING ERRORS
Vanyel: IN THE TELNET MARS!
Al: stty ARSE
Vanyel: WICKY WICKY WICKY
marcie: *insert retro beatbox moment*
cuinhell: hahahah

So, well, it’s sort of become an inside joke among the clued (i.e., us). I suppose if I have to explain it, it’s not funny. Oh well; I tried.